Rooster Badger

Kfj’s Cryptozoology Corner- Exhibit #4

just thank God they’re flightless.

Such is the folly of man, that we’ve never learned to clip our waxen wings before we fly too close to the sun.  So what’s the latest name in the Great Ledger of Man’s Foolish Attempts to Play God? May I introduce to you The Giant East African Blue-Speckled Squalus Rooster.  (My apologies for the photo being in  black and white, but the country of Africa hasn’t invented color film yet.)

The Blue-Speckled Squalus Rooster is not a creation of nature’s design.  They are the mad concoction of a Big Science genetic engeering program to create a rooster that can effectively protect the coop from foxes, badgers, and the political enemies of General Mbataro’s People’s Army.

Unfortunately, no one counted on the fact that the species would not only survive but thrive on the savanna, where it knows no natural enemies (beyond President Kintumbo’s Republican Army).  Both their size and population grew exponentially at an alarming rate and now often take more than two harpoons with barrels attached to wear them out before it’s safe to go to work with machetes.

Fortunately, the forces of good are working on their own plan to curb the unchecked growth of the Squalus Rooster population and right the wrongs of scientific tinkering with Mother Nature.  The United Nations is now funding research to develop a breed of flying fox that can spray anti-chicken bacteria from a gland beneath its tail.

While it’s true some African authorities have raised concerns that this might lead to massive deaths in regular chicken populations (causing widespread starvation), those authorities have been discredited and declared Mbtaro sympathizer’s by African President Kintumbo.  The African Prez has since assured the U.N. that “no one will lift a hand against the new project”, and proved his good will by having the army remove the hands of all of those who have critized them.

About the Author

I just stay home and I drink rum.

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